Achy Breaky Me

Remember how I said I hate exercising? I think God has a weird sense of justice, or maybe it's karma getting me for opening my mouth.
I've been hurting around my midsection--first tummy, then kidney-zone-area-- since last night. Thought it might be something I ate, but no... and it kept up all night long. That's two nights with not enough sleep, so if I'm grouchy today you'll know why.
Still, I have to lose at least 40 lbs. or my health problems will only multiply.
Argh.
Can't some lab somewhere invent a process that does it for me, pain-free, fast and easy?
My future Utopia is not coming along fast enough.